The Linkful Triad Trilogy and Other Plays: The Collected Work of JJ Thompson Page 2
Alex: You guys know that I will be going onn jeopardy in too days and I wanted to say fair well. I am leaving tomorrow, so I can make the shoe on time!!!!!!!!!!!
Pee: (Hugs Axel.) I'm gonna miss you, Axel!!!!!!!!!!
Axel: I'll be back in a week, yo!!!!!!!!
Bee: I'm gonna miss you too, Alex, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lee: I am kunda glad he's leeving, because now I am your leader, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pee: WHAT!!!!!!!! When did hee say that!!!!!!!!!!
Alex: I told it too him in private, without you guys nowing, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bee: But, I thought I was your right man hand, Axel, HOMY!!!!!!!!
Axel: YEAH AND YOUR GONNA BE LEE'S RITE HAND MAN WHILE IM GONE, YO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bee: Okay…………………………………………………..
Pee: What will I doo?
Axel: Do whatever you normally do!!!!!
Pee: Okay, Alex!!!!!!!
Axel: You're the man now, DAWG!!!!!!!
Lee: I know, Axel!!!!!!!!!!! I'm gonna miss you!!!!!!!!! You better win on jeopardy, yo Alex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Act 2 Seen 1: On the jeporde studios GAME SHOW!!!!!!! Axel, and the two otter contestants, PIXIE AND DUST (HA, HA, HH, A, HA!!! GET IT!?! PIXIE DUST!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Alex Trevek: Yo!!! WELL COME TOO JEPARDY, YO!!! Tis is the bestest show ebar, yo!!!!!!! Now, lets meat are 3 people on the show!!!!!!! FIRST, WE HAVE OUR CHAMP PIXIE, WITH A AMAZING $400,000, 000,000 DOLLARS!!!!! Then we have dust who is a teechar frum Oklahomo!!!!!! THEN WE HAVE ALEX WHO IS TEH LEEDER OF THE GANG "THE BLADES" FROM HARLAM!!!!! Whooo!!! Now, our catsegorgies for the day be Stanniel Kubrick films, Monkeys, Compooter Scienfe, Famous Bills, and FIVE LETER WERDSA!!!!!! Pixie, we start witr yoo!
Pixie: I taked famous Bills for 200 pleese!
Alex Trebek: Yokay!!! The answr is "This bill played in the movie "SLING BLAD”.
Axel: Bill Bob Thornton!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Alex Trebeck: YESSSSSSSSS!!!!!! Now picks another categorie!
Alex: I want to tak monkeys for 400.
Alex TREbek: Well, too bad!!!! JUST KIDDING. The anser is "this was the kiond of monke we would see in tehe forests!!!!
Pixie: Ape!
Alex Terebek: NO!!!
Axel: Babboon!!!
Alex Trebek! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pick again.
Axel: I will take Biblical Characters for 900!
Alex Trebek: OKAY! "The answer is "This charaxter from the bible was GHEY!!!”
Pixie: SODOM!!!
Alex Trebeck: WRITE!!!! Now we enter round two!!!!!! Same categories, and Alex it's your game!!!!!
Axel: I'll take Stanley Kubrik films for 500!!!!!!
Alex Trebek: In this film, there is a man that fals in love with a forteen year old girl!!!! What a sicko!!!!
Axel: What is MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!
Alex Trebek: That 1500 dollars that you have now!!!!!!
Alex: I'll take Stanley Kubrick films for 400 please!!!!!!!
Alex Trebekl: This Kubrick film was a war movie, starring Gene Hackman!!!!!!!
Dust: What is Pats of Gory!!
Alex Trebek: RIIIIIIGHT!!!!! You now have 600 dollars!!!! Now, we go to Final Jeopardy, where Pixie has 100 dollars, Dust has 600, and Axel has 15000. That Final Jeopardy categorieis "Flammable Stuff". The answer is "If you catch this hair product on fire it will more thajn likely burn your hole house down". "Go". (That gay song plays for a whil All right, people let's see what you said!!! Axel you said "hairspray". That's right and you wagered all of it. You know have 40000 dollars!!! Pixie, you said mousse, and you wagered..., all of it, you know have 0 dollars!!!! Dust, you said "hairbrush" That's wrong, and youu wagered 100 dollars. You have 300 dollars, but that is not enough!!!!!!!! O new champion is AXELLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!! WITH 300000 DOLLARS!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR ALEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!!!
Act 3-- Scene 1: Alex went on the show nineteen more times and won 900 trillion bazillion gillion billion tadaillion fraillion hoilliad dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He is in the streets of harlem with the fellow blades.
Lee: YOU DID IT, ALEX!!!!!!!!!
Axel: Did you take good care of the Blades while I was gone, Lee?
Pee: NO!!!!!! He beat us!!!!!
Bee, Lee, Pee, and Axel: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, yha, ham!!!!!
The END!!!!!!!?
Author's Notes, yo: Wasn't that so awesome!!!!! That is the best play I have ever wrote!!!!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! I am such a grated writer!!!!!!!!!
Linkful Triad Trilogy: Part III
What’s Your Take on Cassavetes, Yo?
Characters:
John Cassaveteys: The best director onn God's GREEN ERTHE!!!!!!!!! WHOO-HOOB!
Mary Cassavetes- John's wife.
Ben Gazzara- The person playing the character Cosmoo in theadventers of a Japanees Rookie.
Nick Casavettes- John's lesser son, yo.
Act 1-- Scene 1: The Cassavetes household. Mary lay in a rocking chair, knitting, and John sits on the very epensive sofa with a Heineke (HEINEIKIN iS SOOOOo0ooooOOOO AWESUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)n beer.
John: I LOVE FOOT BAALLLLK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Mary: Cood yoo please be quite, honey, Nick's trieing to sleep!!
John: I'll show you tryoing to sleep, yo!!!!!!!! (Gets upand slaps his wife)
Mary: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!! (Crying on the flore.) That hurt, yo!!!
John: Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! Nick's trying to sleep, yoo whore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mary: (Crying) Yes, dear…..
Nick: (Walks on stage) Daddy, I heaed yelling and screaming and mommy crying, is that food?
John: No, son, (Takes a sop of bear.) that's not good. That's the sound of a slut crying her whiny little eyes out!!!!!!!!!!!! That'sone of the worst sounds in the world.
Nick: (Mary begins to cry even harder.) Daddy, when I grown up I wanna be JUST like yoo, yo!!!!!!
John: I know!!!!!!!!!! Who dusnt, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!!! Now, go t on to o bed, Nicky-cheeks!!!!!!!!!
(Nikc walks offstage.)
John: (Walks over to Martha's body and kicks it.) You whore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yu woke up the boy!!!!!!!! Youy dumb woman!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mary: You hit me!!!!!! It hurt, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
John: Well, you didn't have to cry so dang loud, now did yoo, bitch!!!!!!!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ah!!!!!!!! (Slaps Mary.)
Mary: (Wipers as she curls up on the floor and cries her gay little eyes out.) Boo-hoo! Boo-hoo!!! BOO-HOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
John: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,!!!!!! (Drinks some more beere!!!!!)
Act 1-- Scene 2: In John's Kitchen, two days after the pervous events. (John had been asleep for one whole day due too an EXTREME HEDACKE, YO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.) Mary coo something and John sits down reeding the newpaper, waiting for fgood. Nick has already at school.
Mary: That food's ready, dear. Come andn get it!!!!!!!!!!
John: Alright! (Gets up and goes over to stove with his empty plate, his wife scrapes bakon on his plkate and makes it full. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! John kisses his wife on the cheek, playfully.) Ooooh,honey! Wher that broose come from!!!
Mary: (Small tears comingn to her eyes.) I was walking in thre den the other knight and tripped on one of Nicks carelessly left around toys and fell flat on my face, yo!!!!!
John: Oh, well, hat's a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, bery, verry, very, verty, very, very, veruy, bert, very, verym very bad bruise!!!!!! M you should put some viseen on it.
Mary: Yeah... Yeah, I'll do
that. What time do yoo you have to be at work today?
John: I have to be there at 12:00 sharp. I can stay for lonch today!!!!!!!!
Mary: That's nise!!!!!!!
John: Hey, Mary, why don't you come with me to work today!!! MAYBE I CAN NAKE YOO AN EXXXTRA IN TEH MOVIE. YO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!
Mary: Yea, like that I WOULD!!!!!!!!
John: What woold you like to do!!!!!!!!!
Mary: Anything fine, huney!!!!!!!!
John: Your so nice!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm the luckest guy in the world to have a wife like you!!!!!!!
Mary: (Mutters) I'm the UNLIKIEST woman in the world, then……!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
John: What was thatk, dear!!!!!
Mary: Oh, nothing..... Just thimking of a recipe for German Toast!!!!!!!!!!
John: GERMAN TOAST!!!!! That's wonderful!!!!!!!! Ill put it in my movie!!!!!!!
Mary: But how!!!!!!
John: Ill have Ben's character—that's Cocksmoc, by the way—go into a bra to get some coffee and a slice of German toast!!!!!!! Hs, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ham!!!!!!!! I am a genius!!!!!
Mary: That's..... That's very clever of you, John!!!!!!!!!!!!
John: I know!!!!!!!!!!!! I am god of movies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Mary: It's nine0clock!!!!! We better hurry up and start cooking lunch iff we want to make it to the ste on