The Linkful Triad Trilogy and Other Plays: The Collected Work of JJ Thompson Read online

time!!!!!!!!! (Pops a turkeyu in the oven.)

  John: How long will this take?

  Mary: Not long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  John: Well, this danm turkey better hurry up, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't wanna get fired because of a goddame turkey!!!!!!!!!!

  Mary: You won't, deer!!!!! Trust me!!!!!

  John: I had and idea!!!!!!!!!!! Whenever Ben get his German toste, YOU WLK BE THE THE WAITRESS!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!

  Mary: A waitress..... That's lovly. Honey……

  John: Do you knot wanna be a waitess? I'll get someone else to do tit!!!!!

  Mary: No, I wanna be a waitress!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll be a very, very, very, vary good waitressq!!!!!!

  John: Ha, ahah, hah, ha, ha!!!!!!!!! Thta is so funny, Mary!!! I know you will be ever so amazzing.

  Act 2 Scene 1: On the set of Killimg of a Chinese rookie.

  MaryP: Where do I sstand, hunny??!?!?!

  Jon: I will tell yoo that information in 1 minut, honeytits!!!!

  Ben: WHO IS THIS!!?!??!?!?!?!

  John: This is my wife, ben.!!!!! Yoo know, the 1 I have sex with!!!

  Ben: Ha, aha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ham!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO FUNNY IS THAT!!!

  Maty: HAHAHAHAH!!!!! Now were do I sitand Wait! Don't make me were that!

  JohN! (holding whorey outfit) Yoo wil where it because yor charater is a slut and yoo are a slut and this is what a lot off sluts that I have met wear and since that info Is corr then yoo will be forced two where itt because I am both teh daracter of this flick and your husband you will obey everything I tell yoo to do so sdo it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Mary: BUT, HUNNY I WILL FEEL TO MUCH LIKE A HORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  JOHN: SHUT UP CUNTFACE MCGEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOO R ASTOOPID WOMAN AND I AMA SMA MAN AND I OWNZ j00!!!!!!

  Mary: OKAY, YO!!!!!! I wuill where the whoret costyume becosue I luv you and I want nothing more than to maoke you happy and if it will mak youy happy, then I will do IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Ben and John laff out loud verry lowdly and with loudness

  JoHn: HA, HA HA, HA, Ha. Jha ha ha ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, HA HA!!!!!!!!!! I sware, mary you is such a slut sometimes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ha, HA HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, AH, AH, AHA!!!!!

  The scene is shtot, hoever thr durector wanrs it too looks

  John:L THAT WAS TEH BEST SEEN IN ANY FLICK EVAR MADE WITH THREE CHEEERIOS ON TOP!!!!!!!!!! I love cherries!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Mary: then I will mak yoo a cherrie caserolle when we get home because I am a wooman and ti is my job too cook and clean & mop & work and all that shit while my darling husband works hrad two make hard MOOLA and put pretty dresses on my back, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Ben: YOO NBET YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  JohN: HAH, HA, HA, HA, HA, HAR, !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHIT, MAN, THAT IS SUM FUNNY, FUNNY STUF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Ben: Ha, Haa, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, AH, AHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I bet the sperm from your penis will stane some pussy toknight!!!!!!!!!!!!

  John: (givng thumbs uup) HELL, YEAH, YO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  THE END!!!!!!!!!???????????

  Arthur's Noters: OK, so I no thish wuz short!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I SO SORRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think that thisplay will have a lot too sa aboot CCASSEVETES because he are such a greate director, but he always FUCKED WOMEN WRONGLY. I say this because he kicked them and punched them and hurt tem a cut them and stabed them and shot them and kllied them and that is not write in any way what so ever!!!!!!!!!!! I am sirius here, folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dont fuc weomen the wrong way or they will feel bad& stoop fucking yoo!!!!. They cant hurt you tho, cause they just women. BUT KILLING/BEETING WOMAN IS WRONG ON MANY S LEVELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO DO NOT DO IT OR I WILL CUM TO YOUR HOWS AND BEET YOU, yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my GIRL FREND is all goth AND SHIT SO IT IS ALRITE FOR ME TO HER BUT YOURE GF IS NOT GOTHIK AND HATES BEGIN CUT SO YOO SHOOD NOT CUT HER ANYWEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ok, no my momma calling me so I better go to diner. I LOVE DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TURKY IS THE BETS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DIDJOO Catch my terky revere in my Cassavetes play, BTW? IT IS SO AWESUM.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?

  Taste of Silence

  Author's Notes, yo: This play is abowt a very famous Jap cereal killer, ISSEI SAGAWA!!!!!!!! Issei is a very, very, very, very, bery, very bad man man and I am IN NO WAY A OF HIS, yo!!!!!!!!!! But that dont mean that I can't rite a play about him. See, while I tink dat Issei is a bafd person, I ALso find him pretty neat b/c he's so weird. He kiled a ate a french woman in the 1960's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE ATE PEOPLE, YO!!!!!!!!! Momma's a head-doctor (forget what thye is called) and she even thinks this dude is wired!!!!!!!!!! ANYWHO, dis play is awesum and I love it very mnuch!!!! Ha, ha, haa, ha, ha, ha, ha,!!!!!!!! Its almost as cool as my LINFUL TRIAD TRILOGY, but not qwite. WARNIGN: This most violent play evar so dont read it if you cant tummmy that sort of stuff!!!!!!!!! I am pretty consrevative myself but i DONT THINK MYART SHOULD BE LIMITED!!!!!!! Also, play gets kinda "postmodern" (ha, ha, ha, ha, haa,h a, ha, ha!!!!!!!!! momma taught me that word) it gets at times because it is pretty fcked up so dont reed it if your dumb Please & thanks enjoy!!!!!!!

  Character List:

  Issei - Killer!!! Hes a crazzy oriental dood who enjoys the taste of flesh!!!!!

  Susan - French lady with major frenchy accent.

  Marie - SUsans french friend also with a french accent

  Chan - Issei's roomate & uber-close friend

  Inspector Chingchong - Cop

  Act 1, Scene 1 -- Outside (in Japan) with lots odf Japanes stuff and shit. Mairie and Susan are waking around and then Issei comes behind the girlys and sets down at a conveniently-placed table. HA, ha, ha, aha, ha, ha, ha, hga, ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Mary: Susan, I am sooooo mglad tath our parents sent us too Japan for the weekend it is so much funn here!!!!!!!!

  Susan: Yes!!!!

  Marie: Ha, aha, ah, ha, ha!!!! It is so hrad to be a Frecnh woman here in China!!!!!!

  Susan: YEs it is, Marie!!!!! Everybody looks at us funy witch makes me fel like a monkeyu in a zooo!!!!!!!!!

  Issei: (gets up from tabel and walks over to the ladiez) Hello women, my naem is Issei and!!!!!!!!!

  Susan: Hello, Mr. Issei, we are French tourits!!!!

  Issei: YEs, I am sory but I overherd you. (gets on his hands & iknees, bowing and shit) On behalf of Japan, I woold like to apologize for every single baad look that you have gotten!!!!

  Mary: OH, WHAT A NICE MAN YOU AER!!!

  Susan: YUes, you are a very nice and trustworthy man, Mr,. Sagawa.

  Issei: Well, to ferther sorry to you, may I take you out for a dreink?!!!!!!!

  Susan: YEs,. that would be very nice, Mr. Sagawa!!!!!!

  Marie: Im sorry that I cannot, but I doo tank you for teh kind offer!!! I will go hom now, Susan!!!!!!!!!! You two, have funn!! (walks off)

  Issei: Ha, ha, ha, ah, ha, ha, ha!!!!

  Sunas: Wat is so so funny, MR. Sagawa?!!!!

  Issei: Pleawse, Susan, call me Issei!!!!

  Susan: Okay, Issei!!! I will cal yoo Issei, Issei!!!! Now whar is so funny, Issei?

  Issei: It is so funny that you're frend left you behind because NOW I will kille kill you!!!!!

  Susan: Hah, ha, aha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, .ha,. ha, ha, ham!!!!!!!!!!!! You are a funy man!!!!! Now that uyou are thru joking, will you buy that drink fro me now?

  Issei: I are not jokin, GIRLY!!!!! Ha, ha,a a, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! (punches Susan in the face which knocks her out)

  Act 2, Scene 1 -- At Issei's house!!!! Chan is on da couch, asleep when Issei walks in with da knocked-out Susan on his back!

  Issei: I must be vary quietu so my roomate doth not wake up and find out that I are killing woman!!!!

  Chan: (wakes up) Hello Issei who is that on yuor back!!!!!!!

  Issei: Oh, hello Chan I am very sorry that I wok yoo up!!!!! This is a very nise ghirl who pased out and I am going too let her sdleep here tonight!!!!! Is that okay!!!!

  ChanL: Ha, aha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! Issei, yoo are such a nise guy somethimes!!!!! Your my hero!!!!!!!

  Issei: I know!!!!! Ha, ha, haa, ha, ha!!! By the way, can yoo go to the marsket and buy rice, sooshi, chopsticks, eggrolls, soy sauce, fish good, and shampoo?

  Chafn: Sure, Issei!

  Issei: Thanks!!!!

  Chan: No promblem!!!!! (walks out)

  Issei: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ah, ha, ha!!!!! (puts susan on the couch) Hold on, dead girl!!!! I will be right back and I will kill you!!!! (this is where uit gets maniacal) Ha, ah, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!! (walks out)

  Susan: (wakes up) Were am I!?!?!? I have no idea wherte I am!!!!!

  Issei: (walks back with knife ifn hand) Oh no my woman is back up!!!!!

  Susan: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOO DOGNI!!!!!!!

  Issei: (runs to SUsan and stabs her)

  Susan: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (dies)

  Issei: Oh I hav killed a woman!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Act 2, Scene 2 -- In da kitchen!!!!!! Issei is at the ta0ble with the now-dead Susan at his side, bleedinmg and shit.

  Issei: Hmmm...............Now that my woman is dead wat wikl I do with da remains?!!!!!!! Oh, I know!!!!!!!!! I will cook them in my ovne and then I will eat tjhem for my meal!!!!!!!!!!! (picks up the dead bnody and folds it half, then throws it in the oven) Ha, ah, ha, ha, ha,. ha, ha, ha, ah!!!!!!!!!! I AM EVIL!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!!!!! (a dor is heard offstage (special effects) and we hear Chans voice)

  Chan: Issei!!!! They were out off FISH GOOD is but I got som parsley insted!!!! HEY WAIT!!!!!! Issei did you cutt your finger on da couch AGAIN!!?!!??! THERE IS BLOD EVERIWHERE!!!! (enters) WHY is that sleeping woman dead and bleding!!!!!

  Issei: She got sick!!!!!!!

  Chan: ISSEI WHAT HAVE YOO DONE!?!??!?!?!

  Issei: (kills cHan)

  Chan: (dies)

  Issei: HA HA, HA, HA, Ha, , ha, Ha, Ha, ha!!!!!!! This is good!!!!! (picks up both dead bodies and puts them in oven) Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! (time passes and the daracter of play can make Issei do whatever they want him to do!) GOOD!!! MY HUMAN IS DONE!!!!! (goes to oven and starts eatin and shit) HA, Ha, ha, aha, ha, HA, ha, Ha, !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Act 3, Scene 1 -- Issei sits on da couch eatinmg a sandwitch made of people and bread!!!!!!!!

  Issei: YEs this sandwhich is vary good!!!!! Ha, ha, ja, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, hga!!!!!!! People taste so perfecrtly good!!!!!!!!!! (a knock at the door) Oh, wow! WHo could that be!?!?!?!?! (opens door)

  Inspector Chingchong: Mr. Sagawa, you are under arrest. (slaaps sum cuffs on Issei Sagawa) AND SENTENCED TO DEATH!!!!!!!!!!! (shoots Issei Sagawa)

  The End!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????(?)

  Author's Notes, yo: Ha, ah, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!!!! TAKE THAT, DIRTY CEREAL KILER!!!!!! Issei Sagawa totaly deserved to die. HE KILLED AND ATE A WOMAN!!!!!!!! NOT EVEN J CASSAVETES STOOPED THAT LOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG dude. Sick fuckgtard wus he!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seeriously people dont eat people!!!!! I doubt that thye even taste good!!!! Gro gross groos!!!!!!!!!!

  A Brief History of Crime

  Author's Notes, yo: Tish is a varygood play I wrotre about HISTORY BEING RE-CHANGED witch is very clever!!!!!! As wee all know, G. Bush won da 2005 election last year, running aganst JOHN CARIE. I wont let mye personal pollitics come in da way (CAUSE THEY WOULD BLOW YOO AWAY (HA, HA ha, ha, haa, ha, ha, ha!!!!!!!!!!)but John Carri sOOOOOOOOOOOO GHEY!!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, ah, ha, haa, ha, ha,!!!!!!!!!!This play is aslo simi-inspired by EDWARD 2 by Willima Shakespear!!!!! We had to reed it for English cl It is vary GHEY but some

  Characters, yo:

  John "ABRHAM" Carrie - Winner of da president.

  Johnny Eduards - 2nd in comand, yo!!!!!!!!!

  Missy Carie-HINEZ - johns wief who bathes in kethcup from what I here.

  George BUsh - The prez in reel lief,BUT NOT IN MY CRAZZY FICTION WERLD!!!!!!!

  Dick Cheney - Bald dood wiht a AWESOME NAEM!!!!!!! Ha, ha, ha, haa, ah, ah!!!!!

  Sodom Hussein - EVIL, EVIL, EVIL, BAD, BAD MAN!!!!!!!!!

  Act 1, Scene 1 -- In the oval ofice, john carie sits behind his desk!!!! He is making out wiht Johnny Edwards which is realy gross but stay with me here!!!!!!!

  John: Ha, ha, ah, ah, ha, haa, had. Ha!!!!!!!!!! Johnny we are ghey together!!!!!! Call in Gorge Bosh so that I can be mean to him!!!!!!!

  Johnny: Yes, lover!!!! Shood I call in Dick to??!!!!!!!

  John: PLEASE DO THAT AS WELL!!!!!!!

  Johnny: DICK!!!! GEORGE W. BUSH!!!!!!! COME INTO THE OVAL OFFICE!!!!!!!!!

  John: Call mi wief too would yoo too sweety-bins!!!!!!!!

  Johnny: MISSY!!!! COME!!!!!

  (George Bush, DIck Cheney amnd MISSY CARRIE walks in!!!!! DICK IS WHERING A DRESS because john carrie has forced him to. Dick and George looks REAL BAD!!!!)

  George: What is it mr. President?

  John: GORGE BUSH, GO GET ME STUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Gerogeg: I will go get yoo stuff because I am helpless............................................. (george leaves so he can get stuff)

  Dick: what can I do, John?

  John: Tut! What did I tell you to call me?

  Dick: Sigh I am sorry, ABERHAM!!!!! What can I doo you for?!!!!!

  John: You can change dresses!!!! That one is not appealing to my sense of sight!!!!!!!!

  Missy: Hello my dear husband what can I do for you!!!?

  John: (walks from behind his desk and hits his wife HARD across tre faec) HA, haa, ha, ha, ha, aha, ha., ha, ha, ham!!!!!!!!! YOUI ARE A DUMB, DUMB WOMEN!!!!!!! JohnEd is my ghey l;over now and you are my ho that I shall keep on da side!!!!!!! Ha, aha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ah, ha, ha, haq, ha, ha, ha, hal,aha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Missy: (crieing) BOO-HOO!!!!! Boo-hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

  Johnny: Go eet some ketchup, you hore!!!!!!!!!!

  Missy: (runs away cryting)

  Johnny: It are so fun being evil, my ghey lover, Aberham!!!!!!

  John: INDEED IT IS, JOHN EDWARDS!!!!!!!

  Act 1, Scene 2 -- A small room with a tabel int da middle of it and some echairs and shit around it.!!!!!!!! Ha, aha ha, ha, ha!!!! Its awesum. Johnny and John sit at da table.

  John: Wen is Sadom Hosain getting here, Lover?

  Johnny: I do not know, Abreham. OH HERE HE IS NOW!!!!!

  Sodom Hssein: (walks in) HEllo Mister adn Mr. President. I have plans.

  John: YAAAAAAAY!!!!! Let me see them, god buddy!!!!!

  Soodom Hussein: I will let yoo se the plans. (starts takin parers out of his backpack and shit) Abreham!!! This wallpaper is vary good!!!!!!!!

  John: Thank you, Sodom Hussein.

  Sodom Hussein: Anyway, these plans. They very good plan s fro WORELD DOMINATION!!!!!

  John: Heee, hee, hee!!!!!!! (evil MANIAC LAUFGH!!!!!)

  Johnny: HONEY YOO ARE SO CUTE!!!!

  John: Yes, John Edward, I am cute!!!!!!!!! CUTE AND EVIL TATH IS!!!!! Ha, ha,aha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!!!! Now sodom Hussein please eplexaind these EVIL PALMS TO ME!!!!!

  Sodom Hussein: Yes Aberham Lincoln I WILL EXPLAIN PLANDS TO YOO NOW!!!

  Act 2, Scene 1 -- John and John is in da Oval Office booth ,laughing abowt something THE AUDIENCE IS FORCED TO WONDER HA., ha, ha, ha, aha, ah,a ga, ha, ha!!!!! I am clever.

  John: Ha, ha, ha,!!!!!!!!!! WE ARE EVIl, John Edwarda!!!!!!!

  Johnny: I am zo hungry that we legalized Murder OH IM SORRY I MEAN ABORTION and tath Sodom Hussein uis helping us take over the world. WE ARE SUCH NA CUTER COUPLE!!!!!!!! Bythe way, hony I am very hungry.

  John: MISSY!!!!! HORE!!!!!!!!! Come in!!!!!!!

  Missy: (wlaks in weating rags and shoit covered in kethcup stains and den gets on her knees) Yes, masters?!!!!!!!

  John: Bring sandwiches woman!!!!!! Has, ha, ha, ha,. Ha!!!!!!!!!! (missy leaves)

  Johnny: (brings a remote control wiht a BIG RED BUTTON OIN it out of the deks) John, can we push iyt yet?

  John: We will do iot soon, my ghey lover. Andwhen we push it WE WILL RULE DA WWHOLE WORLD!!!!!!!!!! Ham, ha, ha, ha, ha, hxc, !!!!!!!!!!!! Johnyy: LEts do it, Aberham!!!!!!!!!!

  John: On da count of five.... (this is where it gets intense)

  1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4.

  5!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(they go to touch da baton when………..)

  George W. Bush: (walks in wit a string on his back, Dick Cheney in a dress not to far behinf) NOT SO FAST HOMOS!!!!!!!!!

  John: What are you doing Georghe W. Bush and what is on the other end iof thgat rope?!!!!!!!!!!

  George: (puls rope tighter to reveal da dead body of SODOM HUSSEIN).

  John: (cries)

  Johnny: Oh, Aberham do not cry!!!!! (drops the remote w/ the button on it on the floor)

  Dick: (shoots remotewith an AWESUM GUN)

  George: Will you stop bein mean, John Carrie:

  John: (still crying) GET OUT OF THE OVAL OFICE, GEORGE W, BUSH!!!!!!!!!!!

  George: THiS ISN'T THE OVAL OFFICE, IT'S THE EVIL OFFICE!!!!!! Now answer the question!!!!!!!!!!!!

  John: George W. Bush yoo do not understand I am evel by natore i cannot give it up so easily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  George: Well, John Carrie, I am sorry to havbe to do this but... Do it, Dick….

  Dick: (shoots john and John)

  George: (as the bullet is shot, Goerge says) I never wanted to... (just to prove what a generaly nise guy he is)

  Dick: Its all yoo now Goerge W. Bush!!!!!!!

  George: (sits at the oval office desK() I feel at home………………

  Missy: (walkes in) George, yoo are my hero!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (makes out w/ George Bush)

  George: HOORAY!!!!!!!!!

  The end!!!!!!!(?)????!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!!!!

  The Stranger Trilogy, Part I:

  The Abortionist’s Daughter

  Authors Notes, yo: Ha, ha, ham, ha, ha, hak, ha!!!!!!!! Dis is da first patt of my THE STARNGER TRILOGY which will BRAKE YOOR FACE WITH ITS UBERAWESOMENESS!!!!! T sereis will be a comapndion peace